I’m beyond tired. I’m sick and tired. I’m sick and tired of hearing about another black woman dying in prison. I’m tired of black men dying in the streets. I’m tired of these confederate-loving assholes marching everywhere defending their flag and inciting overt racism. I’m tired of being pissed off at Bill Cosby for being the lowlife that he truly is. I’m tired of trying to prove that black lives truly do matter when the rest of the world keeps saying they don’t for stupid ass reasons. I can’t take anymore, and it’s having a toll on my blogging.
I sometimes feel like I’ve written all I can say about today’s world. I even considered retiring from blogging altogether. I would take short-lived hiatuses only to come back days or even hours later. In truth, I never took time to truly rest from living as a black person on the internet living in America, and most black folks know that just existing in America is a full-time job of survival.
I honestly don’t know what else to write about. I felt like I’ve said all that needed to be said. I feel exhausted talking about racism and what it’s like to be black in America only to have trolls come and make it seem like I’m wrong, crazy, stupid or just being whiny.
I feel burned out. My writing is not like it used to be. The stress of being black in America has finally taken hold, and it’s effecting me greatly. The thought that the chances of a black person’s life will be taken are considerably high in this nation puts a lot into perspective. Even worse is the strong possibility that there will be those who will justify it.
It’s hard to concentrate even as I write this post. I’m literally beyond tired, so tired that I can’t even come up with new articles to write about. Sure, there are plenty of issues going on. But I don’t have the strength to write about them. Maybe what I need is a longer break from blogging. Maybe I don’t need to blog so much – as much as I used to. One thing I can’t take a break from, however, is being black in this country. That’s a job with no vacation time.
I’m too tired to even think of a clever way to end this article.