Faced With Fatigue

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I’m beyond tired. I’m sick and tired. I’m sick and tired of hearing about another black woman dying in prison. I’m tired of black men dying in the streets. I’m tired of these confederate-loving assholes marching everywhere defending their flag and inciting overt racism. I’m tired of being pissed off at Bill Cosby for being the lowlife that he truly is. I’m tired of trying to prove that black lives truly do matter when the rest of the world keeps saying they don’t for stupid ass reasons. I can’t take anymore, and it’s having a toll on my blogging.

I sometimes feel like I’ve written all I can say about today’s world. I even considered retiring from blogging altogether. I would take short-lived hiatuses only to come back days or even hours later. In truth, I never took time to truly rest from living as a black person on the internet living in America, and most black folks know that just existing in America is a full-time job of survival.

I honestly don’t know what else to write about. I felt like I’ve said all that needed to be said. I feel exhausted talking about racism and what it’s like to be black in America only to have trolls come and make it seem like I’m wrong, crazy, stupid or just being whiny.

I feel burned out. My writing is not like it used to be. The stress of being black in America has finally taken hold, and it’s effecting me greatly. The thought that the chances of a black person’s life will be taken are considerably high in this nation puts a lot into perspective. Even worse is the strong possibility that there will be those who will justify it.

It’s hard to concentrate even as I write this post. I’m literally beyond tired, so tired that I can’t even come up with new articles to write about. Sure, there are plenty of issues going on. But I don’t have the strength to write about them. Maybe what I need is a longer break from blogging. Maybe I don’t need to blog so much – as much as I used to. One thing I can’t take a break from, however, is being black in this country. That’s a job with no vacation time.

I’m too tired to even think of a clever way to end this article.

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16 thoughts on “Faced With Fatigue

  1. Matthew 11:28-29 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

    Jeremiah 31:25 “I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.”

    Isaiah 40:29 He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

    Ephesians 6:13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

    Shalom!

  2. Are you on Twitter? It gets a bad rep for all the trolls, but you can also find a lot of like-minded people and won’t feel like you need to carry the weight of the conversation. Just a thought.

      1. Oh.

        Well that conversation kind of dried up on the vine, didn’t it? I guess I could have looked at your sidebar and seen the tweets. I might follow you just because you probably think it’s weird I subscribe to your blog as it is. Ha!

  3. Several years ago, I was in your shoes.Though I have never been a blogger, I would respond to messages from racists who didn’t agree with me ( like I cared!),but the more I tried to ” educate” them about the truth, them more realistic I became about them. They weren’t interested in what I had to say. Far as I was concerned ,they were getting a kick out of the repetitiveness of my message..they viewed it as comedy, it was their personal form of entertainment ,which I was no longer going to do. I stopped. I’ve seen one trying to bait me on here,but wasn’t haven’t it.

    You have to do what you have to do to restore your energy, don’t let them bring you down like that because that is exactly what their goal is..not to learn from you but to destroy anybody who they think is a threat to their agenda.

  4. ..It sure sounds like you are having quite a temporary burnout at this point in time, dear ‘Wolf-and for that I will be sending prayers and luv your way, keep your chin uP and your mind focused on what is beneficial and true to your soul (and that includes keepin’ it 100, no matter who is insecure because of it).

    “You have to do what you have to do to restore your energy, don’t let them bring you down like that because that is exactly what their goal is..not to learn from you but to destroy anybody who they think is a threat to their agenda.” @M, Exactly-when idiots see one who is both intelligent and (rightfully) passionate about their ideals, it causes them to want to try and steal that light from said source. I hope and pray that ‘Wolf keeps this reminder close to his heart, as he matters a great deal to readers like me..

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