Vern’s Venting: Interracial Dating, Lusting or Whatever

Idina Menzel and Taye Diggs

by Lavern Merriweather

I am constantly amazed at how black women can scream bloody murder about black males who are famous that marry outside of their race, yet turn right around and celebrate the same thing with black women that are famous. Did I miss something here? Isn’t that the exact same thing that you were bitching about (insert a black actor here) is doing, but it’s cool for you?

It really irked me to no end. The black women who made the argument about Diana Ross when she married her fifth white male by saying, “Well, he is a billionaire.” Maybe so, but I’m pretty damn sure that some of her ex white husbands were not rich. In fact they were probably broke-ass leeches who sponged off of her until she wised up and booted their ass. In any case she has a right to make her choice good, bad or indifferent regardless of how somebody else might feel about it. So, why is it then that black women are so determined to raise as much hell as possible because they are pissed that a rich black man chose ‘Becky’ over them?

And if it’s not marrying, then it’s lusting after, and yes, despite what some black women will swear against, many of us do lust after famous white males. In many cases it’s not just white men either.

John Cho

I along with several other black women have professed my undying love for hottie Korean American John Cho. Also, growing up as a child of the 70’s during the height of the kung-fu era, I was madly in girl crush on action superstar Bruce Lee to the point that I was very pissed when I saw a picture of his white wife Linda sitting on his lap. That was my man, and my lap. She’s lucky I couldn’t get to her to snatch her baldheaded – mostly because I was still under the age of 10.

Bruce Lee with Linda Lee Cadwell

Yet, as an adult I have seen a number of examples of black women losing their shit over certain white male celebrities, even ones who would never want in a million years, which is why I am seriously confused by any time I see black famous folks with white spouses. You are sure as shit don’t see the reverse, especially with these celebrated white women who adopt black children, but flat out refuse to date a black male or give birth to a black child the natural way. You know, like those trailer park 300 pound bleached blonde types do? I get it is ok for you to raise a black male, but he better not try to stick his dick in you or ask you out or be seen in public with you as your man.

That also goes for singing star Robin Thicke which I have yet to figure out why black women insist on behaving as if he were some pioneer of interracial romance. He married a bi-racial woman with long hair, light skin and white features big fucking deal. Again, I’m not saying he had to find the darkest girl in the room, but damn, he certainly didn’t step that far from his comfort zone either.

Robin Thicke with Paula Patton

I don’t remember the name of the show, but I recall a program where two cops were entering a bar as a pretty young light skinned black woman was leaving. The white male remarked that she made him wish he weren’t married. Then, the black male says, “You only like her because she has white features.” I mention that scene, because I have heard complaints on several occasions from black women who are bi-racial, or mixed that have light skin and ‘good’ hair, who just hate black men, because they believe they only approach them for that reason. Yet, I will bet my last 20 bucks those same females would leap in a heartbeat at a chance to hook up with a white male who has the same mentality.

It all goes back to slavery times, anything that veers the farthest from us will forever and always be better than us. We are all guilty of it, yet black women love to lament that somehow black men are the only culprits of celebrating white beauty when they do it as well and, in some cases, in the most pathetic desperate fashion.

Case in point, Star Jones’ embarrassing behavior during an interview with movie star John Cusack. Granted, I find Mr. Cusack attractive as well and him being a fellow Chi-Towner gives him extra brownie points. But does Ms. Jones honestly think that her feelings of desire would ever be reciprocated, particularly by a man whose whole industry is based on the ideal that if you are white, then you are prettier, taller, smarter, more capable, exciting, enticing, and just plain more worthy by default – an attitude that I’m almost positive is not lost on the white people made famous by said industry that participate in it every day? They help perpetuate that notion in every way possible, including who they date, fall in love with and marry.

Star Jones

It’s no coincidence that you see a shitload more of black public figures with a white person on their arm than you will ever see the reverse, nor is it only white people. Recently, Indian actress Aishwarya Rae adamantly refused to be the leading lady to black actor Will Smith. And don’t delude yourself into believing that she is the only one.

Other people of color think that white is the epitome of grace, class, sophistication. Too bad. I had such high hopes of being the middle of a Yune brothers sandwich. Oh well.


8 thoughts on “Vern’s Venting: Interracial Dating, Lusting or Whatever

  1. I don’t believe in Blacks and Whites intermarrying or dating The races should stay separate and even live separately. No self respecting Black person would date a White person because the White man is our enemy.

    1. I hate to admit it, but sometimes I feel the same way. I used to think it didn’t matter as long as they truly love each other, but from what I’ve seen, most of these relationships are based on stereotypes.

      1. I know right. Most White women and Black male relationships are based on stereotypes, that is why they have the highest divorce rate in the country. Ironically Black women and White male relationships last the longest. Either way, I believe in Black love and only Black love.

  2. I’m not sure if the purpose of this post was to:

    1. further align Black women
    2. offer psuedo help
    3. just. i. can’t. even.

    The majority of Black women date/marry and procreate with Black men…

    But, then the bigger question is:

    Why do Black people (including Black women) feel the need to police Black women’s sexuality yet will cry foul when whites do it???

    This post makes no damn sense to me! Yea–i went there because the very miniscule number of Black women having a “thing” for white men is not stopping Black progress.

    Policing Black people and culture also means seeing Star Jones’ “behavior” as “embarassing”…maybe i missed something–cause the last i checked Black women were/are not a monolith. One Black woman’s preferennce for interracial doesn’t define my romantic tastes.

    This post is rife with anti-Black woman rhetoric…


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